Anticipating fathers death

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luna

My father has cirrhosis of the liver, 25% kidney capacity and a DNR on his file. It is likely this is his last Christmas. He coerced and manipulated me to enable his drinking and I have issues with anxiety, conflict and food as a 36 year old adult. I have no self worth. He snapped at me when I was 10 years old calling me fat. He would drive drunk to buy more alcohol. I’m so angry at him but I feel so guilty I enabled his addiction. I just feel like I’m in this agonising limbo waiting for him to die.

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