Buying booze – enabling?

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maire

Hi all, first post. I’m struggling with my dad’s drinking which has started spiraling lately – could be drinking about 20 cans of strong cider a day and he has stage 3 cirrhosis. Sometimes he asks me and my stepmum to buy him booze. I refused initially but he’s going to drink and I don’t really want him driving drunk. Am we enabling him? We’re both scared he might kill someone if he drives. It’s putting us in a horrible situation. Has anyone dealt with this issue?

  • listener

    Hello,

    I'm so sorry to hear about your dad's drinking and the impact this is having on you all as a family. It sounds like you're feeling very torn about buying him alcohol which I can completely appreciate. On the one hand you don't want to enable his drinking, but you also don't want him driving under the influence. It sounds very scary and is a lot of pressure on you and your step mum.

    Ultimately I don't think there are any right or wrong answers, as each situation is different. There are some resources on the Nacoa website that can help guide you in terms of approaching your dad about his drinking that might help. You can find those here: https://nacoa.org.uk/research-resources/publication/

    Do you and your step mum have any support at the moment? Dealing with all of this must be very difficult, and it is important to have people who you can rely on for support when needed.

    I'm so glad you're reaching out on here and hope that helps.

    Take good care of yourself.
    Listener

    • maire

      We support each other but nothing other than that. It's very hard. I'll have a look at the publications.

      Thanks for replying, sorry about double-posting - there was an issue with the board last week!

  • listener

    It's good that you have each other in this difficult period. I hope the publications help, do keep posting if it helps, you are not alone and Nacoa is here for you as long as you need.

    Take care.

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