How Should I Approach Having My Father Choose Alcohol Over Our Family.
We recently reached a breaking point with my alcoholic father.
Sadly, alongside some other frankly unforgivable information, he chose drink over me, my mum and my sister. He’s always had a stressful job, and my Grandma losing a battle with Dementia this year; I had a lot of hope that we’d found the light at the end of the tunnel.
Now, I think I never knew the man. Many excuses revolved around things I thought worked or being busy (works away) to avoid my calls, or when I wanted to see him – but it was either drink or girls. For the first week, I kind of felt like this hadn’t hurt me. But I’ve tried for so long now. He said that we neglected him.
I’ve spent the past five hours reading over my text, trying to spark a conversation (before everything) and realising I was trying hard only to get ‘Ok xx’ as a reply. Why wasn’t I worth the battle, not even my mum after 28 years of being married. I understand that being an alcohol-dependent person that something else takes over… but not your kids?
In this week-long bender, I’ve only had one phone call from him, but it was whilst he was ringing all his friends to tell them he’d finally walked away. Honestly, I was just angry and didn’t want to speak. But that was the only time in three weeks he’d tried. I think I’m past trying. But, moving forward, would that just anger him? Even after trying for so long, I’ve ended up just blocking him on everything.
The following steps are the ones I’m scared of the most. Am I doing the right thing by not dealing with my emotions?