I read the letter to children, it made me cry
To the world outside everything was fine, a normal middle class family.
To the world outside everything was fine, a normal middle class family.
Addiction taking priority
Alcohol allowed me to feel like I fitted in
It was the first time I really knew what was wrong with me. For years I had been drinking just to exist but had always justified it as something I deserved.
It was the first time I really knew what was wrong with me. For years I had been drinking just to exist but had always justified it as something I deserved.
It felt as though our family had a shameful secret that couldn’t be discussed
I wanted people to understand, to know what I was going through, but no one understands unless they’ve experienced it themselves and I was too messed up to let people get close.
I wanted people to understand, to know what I was going through, but no one understands unless they’ve experienced it themselves and I was too messed up to let people get close.
Mind the gap
There was a silence filled with clanging feelings of humiliation and doubt and fear.
There was a silence filled with clanging feelings of humiliation and doubt and fear.
Safe as houses: No one hits you, yells at you. But there is a great secret, betrayed only by the knowing looks of others
But you will keep the secret to yourself that isn’t even a secret.. You don’t talk about it, you don’t talk about yourself, you don’t talk about your family, you keep your hopes and dreams to yourself but you don’t know why.
But you will keep the secret to yourself that isn’t even a secret.. You don’t talk about it, you don’t talk about yourself, you don’t talk about your family, you keep your hopes and dreams to yourself but you don’t know why.
The Two Mothers
I am haunted by the idea that the telling of these dark truths is an unwarranted betrayal of my mother.
I am haunted by the idea that the telling of these dark truths is an unwarranted betrayal of my mother.
Crying inside, nowhere to go
The fight to stay sane is sometimes so difficult there were, and are, times when I wonder if it was all worth it.
The fight to stay sane is sometimes so difficult there were, and are, times when I wonder if it was all worth it.
My name is Mandeep. I am 38-years-old and my father was an alcoholic
I had three daddies. ‘Nice daddy’, ‘funny daddy’ who was just slightly drunk, and then of course ‘nasty daddy’.
I had three daddies. ‘Nice daddy’, ‘funny daddy’ who was just slightly drunk, and then of course ‘nasty daddy’.
From the age of 13 I felt as if I was the adult
Dad drank despite how well I behaved.
Dad drank despite how well I behaved.
Listening to you drunk on the phone today broke my heart
I want us to be a close and strong family. Please try – I’ve never wanted anything more than this.
I want us to be a close and strong family. Please try – I’ve never wanted anything more than this.
