Cry for help

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alwayshere

My mum has drank for as long as I can remember but I’d say the last 6/7 years it has got worse and she starts drinking about 12/1pm it has been 11am before!!! I love at home with my dad & partner too but I hate it. I hate being around her as soon as she has a drink her behaviours and whole personality changes, she gets really snappy and takes things so personally. I really hate being here and she’s in denial. She lies about if she has drank or not you can tell she’s drunk just by her voice even my grandparents have said they’re worried about her. I hate talking about it it’s embarrassing and i hate emotional things like this but I just needed to get it out. I have been travelling for over half a year and it was the best time ever as I didn’t have to talk to her when she was drinking because of time difference and now I’m itching to move to another country already!

  • listener

    Hello,

    Thank you for posting and reaching out to Nacoa. I am so sorry to hear about your mum's drinking and how this impacts you. It must be so hard for you right now.

    It must be really hard to have to witness your mum's behaviour and personality change so much and be the receiving end of it when she is being snappy. It is never easy to cope with a parent who drinks, especially when denial plays such a huge part in it, though not saying that excuses how she treats you. It can be such a complex situation. It must feel overwhelming to see how her drinking impacts everything around her and have the deny what is happening.

    It is completely understandable to want to take a break away from it all again. Whilst I am glad you had the time to travel and do something for you, it must have been hard to come back to the situation with your mum.

    I would say that your wellbeing is important and matters in this, so I hope you are able to find ways to keep yourself safe and do things for you. It is hard to put social boundaries in place sometimes, but it is vital to try and look after yourself as best you can. Do you have any support network around you - friends, colleagues etc - that you feel you can talk to about this?

    I do hope the above helps in some way and I hope that posting your thoughts here helped offload some weight for you.
    Nacoa is here for you for as much or as little as you would like us to be. If you would like to receive individual listening support, do feel free to reach us either by calling us on 0800 358 3456 or email at helpline@nacoa.org.uk, both open Monday to Saturday 12 - 7pm

    Take good care,

    • jj23

      Sounds familiar to me. I hated living at home with mum cus of her drinking. I don't even like being in her house, makes me so anxious.

      Things definitely improved for me and my mental health, once I moved out, your environment really does matter.

      However with you not around they may drink even more, I know mine did.

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