I’m scared I’ll never be free
I’m 27 now and my mum has been an alcoholic before I was born. She is currently homeless living in a family members spare room, with no ability to change her situation. Her drinking has led to a total personality change and serious physical deterioration. The hardest part has always been that I still love her. I feel terrified that I will never be able to live a normal and happy life whilst she is still alive, because the emotional weight I carry makes me feel so shameful, I feel I can’t form normal or healthy relationships. I feel so different to everyone else’s like I’m experiencing this a million miles away from even my closest friends. I feel so lost and defeated, and I just can’t see a way out.