My biggest fear has happened and I’ve lost my mum
I am 41 years old with 2 young children. My mum has had a very tough few years with splitting up with my dad, having to move and start life again on her own and as part of that she became very dependent on alcohol to get through day to day which has become very hard over the last few years.
I don’t know how long alcohol has been a part of mums life but I know that there have been times over the years where I have been worried, confused as to what is wrong with mum and also some confronting conversations about her drinking and trying to help her stop. I was always worried about mum injuring herself or worse.
My biggest fears have been realised as 3 weeks ago I found my mum dead at home which has been the biggest and most traumatic shock I have ever been through. I have so many emotions – What happened to her? If I got to her sooner could I have saved her? I can’t believe I’m never going to see her again? What else could I have done to stop her drinking…..The list goes on.
I guess the reason for posting is just to speak to others that perhaps understand as this is so difficult to talk about.