To younger self
I know you are in pain. I can hear your silent crys, the unanswered desperate wishes.
If they could stop would it all be different.
Would they be happy if someone took away the alcohol.
The demons could then not be drowned away only to return again, they could be fought.
I know you believe you are responsible for everything.
That this is your problem to solve, that you have to help your mum/dad..
This isn’t a responsibility that should have ever been put on your shoulders.
You are not to blame.
You aren’t the cause.
And to be honest you can’t be the change.
With the demon that is addiction, love and family sometimes isn’t enough.
This isn’t a reflection on you, it doesn’t mean you have failed or weren’t good enough.
You were the child.
I am sorry you felt unloved.