Every pothole of my ACOA journey was worth it to see my incredible girls grow

We never went without food, clothes, necessities, but we did go without guidance.

I am a 46 year old recovering ACOA and I have to say that going to the AA meetings at an early age (Al-anon, Al-teen) saved my life. My lovely mother was a binge alcoholic who ran a very successful group of Building Societies in Chicago – she was my hero! A very powerful woman that to this day, I still wonder how she managed to run a business and raise 6 kids on her own (the love of her life, my father, passed away unexpectedly when I was born). As you can tell, I forgave her and could not have done that without my support groups and my sponsor. I was able to forgive the person who I wished was dead on a daily basis.

Forgiveness was vital for me as I had years of fear and unresolved anger. It all began when I was 9 years old. My mom came home trashed from a business event. She had blood on the back of her skirt – not knowing what to make of any of this, I thought she was in an accident. The fear I carried with me for years began then. The need to protect her (co-dependence) started then too. Then the anger, piles of anger. I was the last kid at home, so I was the co-dependent child who was there for my horrible alcoholic mother.

We never went without food, clothes, necessities, but we did go without guidance, family values and love. I remember envying my friends’ families… a mom who helped with homework, a mom who sat and chatted, a mom who morally supported.

Before my recovery kicked in, I used people like tissues, I have indulged in drugs, alcohol, cigarettes, spending and food. I was generally an angry person who thought the world owed me something. I used my addictions to try and fill this “void”. My recovery path taught me all about my voids which weren’t so scary after all.

I am a very happy, healthy mother of two girls (ages 11 and 15) and have a wonderful husband. It brings tears to my eyes every time I hear them say things like, “my friends love you mom, they think you are great”, “you are the best mom”, “so and so wishes her mom was like you”… I feel like every crash and fall, every cliff-hanger, every pothole of my ACOA journey was worth it when I see my incredible girls grow.

Serenely

Janice

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Every pothole of my ACOA journey was worth it to see my incredible girls grow

We never went without food, clothes, necessities, but we did go without guidance.

Every pothole of my ACOA journey was worth it to see my incredible girls grow

We never went without food, clothes, necessities, but we did go without guidance.

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I am a 46 year old recovering ACOA and I have to say that going to the AA meetings at an early age (Al-anon, Al-teen) saved my life. My lovely mother was a binge alcoholic who ran a very successful group of Building Societies in Chicago – she was my hero! A very powerful woman that to this day, I still wonder how she managed to run a business and raise 6 kids on her own (the love of her life, my father, passed away unexpectedly when I was born). As you can tell, I forgave her and could not have done that without my support groups and my sponsor. I was able to forgive the person who I wished was dead on a daily basis.

Forgiveness was vital for me as I had years of fear and unresolved anger. It all began when I was 9 years old. My mom came home trashed from a business event. She had blood on the back of her skirt – not knowing what to make of any of this, I thought she was in an accident. The fear I carried with me for years began then. The need to protect her (co-dependence) started then too. Then the anger, piles of anger. I was the last kid at home, so I was the co-dependent child who was there for my horrible alcoholic mother.

We never went without food, clothes, necessities, but we did go without guidance, family values and love. I remember envying my friends’ families… a mom who helped with homework, a mom who sat and chatted, a mom who morally supported.

Before my recovery kicked in, I used people like tissues, I have indulged in drugs, alcohol, cigarettes, spending and food. I was generally an angry person who thought the world owed me something. I used my addictions to try and fill this “void”. My recovery path taught me all about my voids which weren’t so scary after all.

I am a very happy, healthy mother of two girls (ages 11 and 15) and have a wonderful husband. It brings tears to my eyes every time I hear them say things like, “my friends love you mom, they think you are great”, “you are the best mom”, “so and so wishes her mom was like you”… I feel like every crash and fall, every cliff-hanger, every pothole of my ACOA journey was worth it when I see my incredible girls grow.

Serenely

Janice

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